This little old lady calls 000. When the operator answers, she yells, "Help, send the police to my house right away. There's a Labor politician on my front lawn and he's playing with himself.
"What?" the operator exclaimed.
"I said there is a damn Labor pollie on my lawn playing with himself; I don't know him and I'm afraid! Please send the police!" the little old lady repeated.
"Well, now, how do you know he's Labor?"
"Because if he was a Liberal, he'd be screwing somebody!"
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